Living the moment...

A moment is something that cannot be captured or contained...just enjoyed. This is the realisation I have come to over the past few weeks. Yet, despite their lack of tenacity, moments are important. Moments are pinnacle points in life; ones we look on with either pleasant reminiscence or hasty omission. They are like the peaks and troughs on a heart rate monitor; the defining moments in a life which otherwise would otherwise make it a boring and lifeless existence.

Opportunists say to “live in the moment” while realists say “moments are fleeting”. Which do we do? Do we just keep living for the next best moment, while proudly nursing the scares of the bad ones? Or do we long for stability, and normalisation, believing that both good and moments will come again, so life is really just mediocre?

I’ve done something new in the last few weeks, in just really trying to experience the feeling of each moment. Just really being there, observing without judgement, how I feel, what I do, where each moment takes me next. And trying to breath positive energy into every experience. Living the moment, having an experience, taking the good with the bad, and just being happy it happened.  

"Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened" is my favourite Dr Seuss quote. How often we don’t realise things are not happening to us, we are making them happen. My best surfing analogy in this case would be an awesome moment I experienced two weeks ago. I went out for a paddle, struggled to paddle in for a while, until I aligned myself to just having fun, and stumbled on an awesome rip. A rip that literally pulled me in so fast, that I suddenly found myself being pulled out to sea; no paddling required. I had a few seconds to turn around and catch a monster of a wave that I had been struggling for so long. I guess all along I had been making it happen, but when the moment came, it was better, brighter and more awesome that I could imagine.

So I think how often, without positive energy and directional thinking, we miss the opportunities of moments coming along and sweeping us of our feet? How often do we miss out on capitalising on the moment due to sheer ignorance and boredom with life.

I finish with my favourite quote from Paulo Coelho about magic moments: “The magic moment is the moment when a “yes” or a “no” can change our whole existence. Every day, we try to pretend that we do not see that moment, that it does not exist, that today is the same as yesterday and that tomorrow will be the same too.”

True identity; the strongest force

The strongest force in the Universe is a Human being living consistently with his identity.

Tony Robbins

I read this off a calendar page, which had pictures of lightning bolts, aptly, because these wise words hit me like a lightning bolt.

If you ever wonder why your favourite singer, band, surfer or inspirational person, is just so good at what they do, it’s usually because they have an absolute conviction and passion for their identity and who they are. Kelly Slater seeks a swell and just takes off after it. The wave inspires in him a strong link with his identity and who he is. Walking past a bookshop, you may see a new novel or book by your favourite author; something that catches your eye and is consistent with your beliefs and identity. The next thing you know, you are enthralled in prose, again reinforcing in thoughts and beliefs what you believe to be part of your identity.

So when I read this quote, I stopped and thought. I flipped the calendar to this page and earmarked it. It’s amazing when a thought, action, vision or word inspires something in you that causes you to react in a way that is consistent with who you are. For me, a thousand thoughts came to my head, and immediately thoughts of surfing, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Paulo Coelho and travelling flooded my consciousness. I never thought about it, that being who you really are, that enforcing your true identity could be a source of permeating and radiating strength in the Universe. There is a saying that if everyone did what they really loved, the world would be a happier place.

I know that when I am in the moment of surfing, this amazing feeling comes over me. It’s both a feeling of challenge and release; it’s like the energy of an atom splitting. You need to put energy in to release new energy, and for me surfing does that every time. The incredible centeredness and connectedness with my true identity I feel after surfing is indescribable and well, inspiring. I feel with the energy I get from surfing I create a ripple through the Universe, sending out messages of strength, happiness, confidence and peace.

Yes, peace. Because to be at one with the world, we must first be grounded and peaceful with ourselves and our identity. In yoga, my teacher said that each pose teaches you both strength and softness at the same time. You need to use strength to achieve softness and grace in the pose. In the beginning you look for strength to be able to find conviction and consistency in what you are doing. And that is how you build character and identity; that is how you build up the ‘mental yoga’ of your life.

What an amazing concept...that being yourself and living in consistency with your true identity and soul is the strongest force in the Universe? So the message is clear; live at one with yourself and keep at it!

Copyright SoulSurfer © 22 December 2011 at 3.41pm

Being Zen; a time and place?

I was thinking about the concept of ‘being Zen’ over the last few days…the thought tossed around in my head after I read a bit of gossip about Jennifer Aniston. The article said that Jennifer used to be very ‘Zen’ about things and she just let things happen as they come, but since meeting her new love, Justin Theroux, she has become a go getter and started fiercely going after what she wants.

It made me think about the concept of ‘being Zen’…can we ‘be Zen’ all the time? Can we always just let whatever happens happen, and when it does, will it be what he had hoped and wished for? Does the decision to take a step back, and give in to the Universe automatically guarantee we will patiently receive our heart’s desire?

I was also thinking about this concept when I was surfing today. Can I ‘be Zen’ about surfing? I know surfing definitely makes me relaxed, chilled out, complete and happy, but can I ‘be Zen’ in my approach to surfing? Can I just paddle out to a spot, sit on my board and expect an awesome wave to take me on its crest? Yes, I admit a few times, when engrossed in conversation, I have found myself swept away and taken for a ride by some pretty amazing waves, but I guess I worked hard to get there. My surf instructor said that “paddling takes away 100% of your energy”, so even before you are gloriously riding a wave, you are pretty much going all out, paddling in desperation to get to the back. I think had it not been for my fierce, dedicated and at times exhausting paddling, many a time I would have not been able to do the visible part of surfing, known as riding waves.

There are often times all you are doing is paddling, not quite assured if you will get a ride back to shore. But you put the work in, you paddle hard. Sometimes the fruits of your labour occur after an exhausting 30 minutes of paddling and an awesome chance swell, or better yet, chasing down an amazing wave which is breaking some 10 metres from you.

So yes, surf is not all Zen, but a fierce and exciting challenge. If you take away the ‘fierce’ and just replace with Zen, you get a person stuck in a rip, occasionally riding 2 seconds on a wave that docks on the sand.

Similarly, just because you want to accept things as they come in life, does not mean it takes away your responsibility to go after things, when that is what needs to be down. Fierce and Zen can occupy the same room, and it is in fact often the feeling of fierceness that gives us the feeling of Zen. Working hard for something, going against the swell of life and ultimately succeeding, that is what gives inner peace and contentment. There is a time to fight, and a time to rest. There is a time to push on through with little encouragement, and there is a time to surrender and refocus. There is a time to paddle harder, and a time to move on to another spot.

You just have to know when the time is right. Timing is everything. We can never truly be Zen or fierce, we have to always balance back and forth. And timing is everything.

So for me, the only way of life is to live from one extreme to another, and among that find your own, unique, happy balance.

Written by SoulSurfer © 29 October 2011 at 6.56pm

DO WHAT YOU LOVE

It seems the eye of the storm is the perfect place to ponder life. And Sunday afternoon in Manly proved to be the perfect place to be awed by Mother Nature’s beauty and splendour.

Picture this: about two dozen surfers scattered across the choppy and grey-hued sea, desperately competing against each other to catch the remnants of a decent days’ surf. It was about 5.30pm, when Mark and I stopped in our tracks and looked above. What happened over the course of the next 15 minutes was breathtaking.

The surfers continued to paddle towards the kamikaze waves, but our focus had shifted to the sky above. These pictures are simply beautiful. A grey sky melting into yellow across the skyline, finally being lit up with a magnificent red glow from the west. In one place rain began to fall and develop, but on the sunny side the sun struggled back into the spotlight to reveal a beautiful, full-arched, luminuous rainbow, which then cast its Technicolour shadow on the droopy and heavy clouds. The effect was a rainbow glow of light scattered across the clouds.

The photos below.

So Mark and I stopped on one conclusion: focus on doing what you love, and aim to improve yourself in what you love everyday. You only have one life, and the skills, passions and talents you have received in this life to enjoy and experience are unique to YOU only. Aim to be better than yourself everyday. Spend more time giving time to your passions and hobbies. Like Kelly Slater, aim for perfection in your craft over accolades and recognition. Be the best you can be in what you love.

 Life opens up doorways to those who are truly in sync with their life’s purpose. When you dedicate yourself to your passion, your cup is full and overflows; you learn to give to others willingly and selflessly. You cannot give if you are not self-full first.

 The first step lies in giving into your passion. Life is really what you make of it, and if you are in line with your purpose, JUST THINK of what lies ahead for you!

If you are not in line with your purpose, you are not contributing conscientiously to this world. And if you are not contributing conscientiously to this world, you are wasting your time here.

Let us go, and DO WHAT WE LOVE!

Copyright © SoulSurfer 9 August 2011 at 8.43pm

Just do it...

So for me its 30 days until I leave Australia for my holiday which is anticipated to be named “Insane in Spain”… I am safely in a space where I feel that any consequences of my actions over the next 30 days, can be written off as “gone holidaying”…meaning I won’t have to deal with them, (or maybe I won’t care or remember them), until I come back. So basically I am living on the edge over the next month or so, knowing I can jump on a plane and leave it all behind for 3 weeks…I think there is a Dupree (from the movie “You, Me  & Dupree”) in all of us…

But I had a slightly weird thought…what if this was the last 30 days of my life…? What would I do? What ‘insane’ things would I attempt if ‘this was it’?

I think a lot of time, we countdown to holidays, events and parties, thinking that is the time we will go all out, be confident, have fun, do unbelievable things, experience amazing experiences…so what about the rest of the time? Do we live in mediocrity, putting all our anticipation into that one event? Then again, how often do highly-anticipated events or holidays turn out to be less than stellar and heart-racing?

Are our lives like a heart rate monitor; stable most of the time with a few high voltage blips here and there?

I believe everyone is given a unique life, which NEEDS to filled to the brim with things that are centrally important, and that inspire, motivate and cultivate your inner YOU. The only way to define from within, and really feel you have a presence in this lifetime, is to take control of what it is you want to do, who you want to be, what you want to experience, and take steady steps to fulfill these goals.

And not just once in a while, you need to get that heart pumping regularly. Whether it’s booking a last minute extreme sport activity, or going out of your comfort zone to try some exotic cuisine, we all need to start just doing, and reap the rewards of experience.

Don’t be the person who waits until they’re 30, until after uni, until after you have a stable job, to go on an African safari. Don’t put off taking surfing lessons for when it gets warmer. Don’t wait too long to ask out someone who you’re taken an interest in.

While the regret and embarrassment of doing something stupid may last a while, the regret of NOT DOING something usually lasts much longer. And it will keep gnawing at you, until you do something about it.

So if you feel there is something you want to do, just do it! Go for it, with your heart and soul…it may be good, it may be bad, but it’s experience. And we definitely are not experiencing enough of this beautiful life we are given! So just do it! Unleash you’re inner Dupree!

SoulSurfer Copyright © 17 July at 9.08pm

Perfectionism - the obsolete desire driving towards depression

Attaining perfection – it’s the ultimate catch-22. The goal is admirable and lofty, yet rationally, unattainable.

Human beings are constantly bombarded with visions of improvement, betterment, evolution towards the better of their current status. We could say it’s a Western, socio-economic, competitively-fuelled, technologically-advanced problem, but not necessarily – even in the most basic and grassroots village of a third world country, you will find someone who has evolved past what others at the time can attain.

Yes, its human nature to be competitive, to strive for more, to believe we are constantly moving towards bigger, better, deeper into reality-enhancing and improving. Without admitting it, we move towards realities which are more perfect than the current one.

But does the pursuit ever stop? And what impact does it have on our psyches?

Without getting all psychological, there is no doubt that the pursuit of perfection eventually evokes obsession. Never satisfied with the present, forever chasing the future reality, which once attained fuels further pursuit – no wonder a person feels detached from the world, but confident each new step forward will bring reward and finally, rest. Rest from the chase. But setting perfectionism as a goal, defining the parameters of life that will ensure your eternal happiness, is a futile and mind-boggling concept. It’s like an atomic chain reaction – once set off, the connections created are boundless, until an opposing force is strong enough to bring them to an end.

And here is where I throw depression into the mix – having invested so much time, energy into perfecting our lives, we lose touch with the ‘real’ reality happening in the present, with loved ones, work, family – things that meant a lot to us. Ultimately the goal self-destructs (or was never there) and a person realises that somewhere along the way they have also lost much more. So depression kicks in. In all my years of studying psychology, depression in my definition is a disconnection and impaired interpretation of reality. When you make being perfect your goal, you see the world through an imperfect lens.

Ending this article on a positive and uplifting note, nothing is needed more in this world than balance. Constantly monitoring yourself to check when you are out of balance and need to return back to the middle. Meditation is a wonderful thing, as you focus only on the present and clear your mind.

I always believe, “You should not strive to be better than others, but better than yourself”. Real, balanced self-improvement comes from making positive steps forward in your own pace, time, and with adequate resources. It comes from within, and provides satisfaction within.

Once the goal of balance is strived for, you become more appreciative of your life. Balance is impossible to completely attain, but that is why you appreciate what happens in your life, both good and bad. Because it is appreciation for the duality of life that produces balance and harmony. 

Copyright © 5 June 2011 SoulSurfer

Surfing: a metaphor of life and love

Because of surfing, I have come to understand life in a whole new way; everytime I go out surfing the experience is new and unanticipated. You don’t know what it will hold. The best you can do is just let go and let the wave ride you. In time, you develop the skills you need to deal with the waves you are getting. 

In time. 

You may have done that new thing you learned a thousand times before, but it only ‘works’ in the moment you discover it and were meant to discover it.  Sometimes you can do something which in theory produces a result, but have it not work for you. When you put too much headspace into what you want to create, the creativity dissipates and leaves you with only a step by step image of the final result. Get on your board. Paddle. Look up. Stand up. How ungraceful is that? It’s mechanic, robotic. 

When you internalise your passions, take them on and make them part of your being and essence, it is then you become one and can transform the passion outward into the graceful form it is meant to be. 

Surfing is a feeling deep inside. It’s the way the feeling takes over you, guides you to do the right thing at the right time. It’s the magic of all manor of forces coming together in one single moment – when you stand up and let the wave navigate you. 

Surfing is a lot like falling in love also…the end result is beautiful, gracious, amazing…But so much goes into it beforehand. Waxing your board, battling the water for a break, lying in wait for the wave, swimming out to catch it…The bruises, the wipeouts, the sand everywhere…But we do it all for those few seconds, where we can be on top of the world…

Copyright © 7 March 2011 SoulSurfer